Eighteen-year-old Benjamin Nefer seems to have it all: great looks, incredible football skills, and smooth moves that have won—and broken—the hearts of countless girls at his high school. But his hellish home life has left him feeling empty inside, unable to experience real feelings. He thinks he’s fine being this way forever…until he meets a beautiful and witty seventeen-year-old girl named Charlotte “Charlie” Austin. She may be new in town, but she’s already been warned about Benjamin’s reputation, so it’s easy for her to shoot down his advances. Like him, she’s happier keeping people at a distance, especially since she, too, has secrets she’s not ready to share with anyone. But as the tentative friendship between the charismatic football captain and the new girl grows, Charlie finds herself feeling closer to Benjamin than she’s ever felt with anyone—and he wonders if he’s really capable of loving after all. Can they drop their guard, or is this so-called romance just another game?
I don’t feel anything anymore.
If I were going to feel something, it would be for my sister, Mia. She’s gone now, has been for the last eight years since I was nine . . . and I somehow doubt she’s coming back.
I loved her when she was here. I tried to protect her.
When he finally hurt her so badly that she nearly died, torn up inside and out, she came and took her. She left me here, left me with him, completely at his mercy. As far as I know, she didn’t even come back to see if I was okay, if I needed help, if I needed to go, too.
I don’t hate her for that. I don’t even envy her that she got out so much earlier than even Mia. To do either of those things requires feeling, and I don’t feel. Anything. So I live with him still, numb and beyond caring.
How else could I be?
Bennett lives a most unglamorous life in the beautiful state of Utah. She is the author of several YA books in many subgenres. She’s the mom of two daughters, two sons and two daughters-in-law, three dogs, and two grandbabies. She loves gooey cookies, dark chocolate, and cheesy popcorn. She hates housework and cooking, and has no plans to become a domestic goddess. Her favorite pastime—other than writing—is riding her Harley.
(As Kindle, paperback, and audiobook)